Heard on the Hill

Women share pride in Eleanor Holmes Norton dedication at Georgetown Law
Friends and supporters laud D.C. delegate’s role in ‘civil rights and women’s rights and D.C. rights’

Breaking ground on the Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes Norton Green and monument at Georgetown Law Center are, from left, D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser; Georgetown Law Center Dean William Treanor; Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton, D-D.C.; Rep. Jamie Raskin, D-Md.; and Georgetown President John DeGioia. (Clyde McGrady/CQ Roll Call)

The Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes Norton Green at Georgetown University Law Center is a point of pride for the women in attendance for its groundbreaking Tuesday.

Surrounded by her children, grandchildren, colleagues and friends among the 150 supporters beneath a white reception tent on the law center’s green, Norton, 81, basked in the honor and recounted the civil rights and feminist battles fought during her time in and out of office.

Fake Bernie Sanders does a mean ‘Old Town Road’
Jimmy Fallon brought some Lil Nas X to the 2020 primary on Monday night

Bernie Sanders is back for another presidential run, and so is Jimmy Fallon’s septuagenarian impersonation. (Al Drago/CQ Roll Call file photo)

Jimmy Fallon revives his impression of everyone’s favorite septuagenarian socialist but this time throws in Lil Nas X’s viral country rap tune “Old Town Road” … and you know what, it kinda works.

The song is currently in its third straight week atop the Billboard Hot 100. And Bernie Sanders is currently atop the 2020 Democratic presidential field.

Jason Crow has the Monday of all Mondays
Members of Congress: They’re just like us

Democratic Rep. Jason Crow is performing his civic duty back home in Colorado today. (Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call file photo)

Updated 1:25 p.m. | Just when you thought Monday couldn’t get any more Monday, Rep. Jason Crow had to find out the hard way how Monday-y this Monday could get. The Democratic congressman was called to fulfill his civic duty this morning at Adams County Court in Brighton, Colorado.

Marc Veasey, are you my Uber?
Texas Democrat favors a little Brooks & Dunn behind the wheel

Texas Rep. Marc Veasey, left, took a few spins as an Uber driver on Thursday back home in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Above, Veasey poses with his last drop-off of the day. (Courtesy Twitter/Rep. Marc Veasey)

If you assume that all members of Congress get from Point A to Point B by way of large black SUVs hauled by well-dressed drivers in flat caps, pump the brakes.

Marc Veasey is here to prove that he can not only drive himself, he can also drive around residents of the greater Dallas-Fort Worth area. The Democratic congressman from Texas took a few spins around the Lone Star block as an Uber driver Thursday afternoon, and his trips were anything but lone.

Atheist prayers can be barred by House chaplain, appeals court says
D.C. Circuit Court cites interpretation of House rules that say prayers must be religious

Rev. Patrick J. Conroy, chaplain of the House of Representatives, prevailed in legislative prayer litigation on Friday. (Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call file photo)

The House chaplain scored a legal victory on Good Friday, when a federal appeals court ruled he could not be ordered to allow a self-described atheist to offer a secular prayer to the House of Representatives.

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the D.C. Circuit sided with Rev. Patrick J. Conroy, in his official capacity as the House chaplain, and the chamber itself in litigation brought by Dan Barker, co-president of the Freedom From Religion Foundation and a former minister. Barker alleged Conroy improperly rejected a request to have him serve as guest chaplain.

The Mueller report meme game has been strong on the internet
The internet quickly latched on to jokes related to redactions, and some poked fun at the report’s biggest players

Media films a few pages of special counsel Robert Mueller's report on Russian interference in the 2016 election which was printed out by staff in the House Judiciary Committee's hearing room on Thursday, April 18, 2019. (Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call)

The highly anticipated release of the Mueller report prompted a hefty dose of partisan debate, but it also flooded the internet with hilarious memes.

The internet quickly latched on to jokes related to extended information blackouts scattered throughout the report, and meme fabricators poked fun at high-profile individuals intimately involved in the investigation.

The Mueller report is exactly as long as Kim Kardashian’s coffee table book
The special counsel and the reality star both love the number 448. The similarities are uncanny

Kim Kardashian is studying to be a lawyer. (JP Yim/Getty Images)

With all of the heated discussion surrounding the release of today’s Mueller report (and I know what you’re thinking, “What Mueller report?”), I can’t help but notice one thing that’s been redacted (see what I did there?) from the conversation: the ungodly amount of pages in this thing.Now, I’d like to wishfully think that minimal paper has been wasted, since the report was delivered on a CD — because today is Thursday, after all, and apparently we’re throwing it back to 1997. But 448 pages? Random, right?

Not so much. It turns out Robert Mueller isn’t the only law enthusiast who’s penned a literary work (of sorts) at this length. 

What happened when I went to a baseball game instead of reading the Mueller report
Some in Washington scrambled. Others spent the day eating Dippin’ Dots

Something happened in Washington on Thursday: the Nats played the Giants. Above, fans pose for photos with George Washington in the stands at Nationals Park in 2017. (Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call file photo)

You didn’t have to venture far from the Capitol on Thursday to find a crowd of Washingtonians who weren’t overwhelmed by the Mueller report.

Patrick Corbin, the newest Nationals star starting pitcher, took the mound a little after 1 p.m., before key Democrats like House Judiciary Chairman Jerrold Nadler or Senate Intelligence Vice Chairman Mark Warner had even weighed in on the substance of the report.

One thing Barr didn’t redact: the f-bomb
The attorney general and his team blacked out many a word, but they let obscenities stand

President Donald Trump had some choice words for the special counsel’s Russia investigation, the redacted report reveals. (Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call)

The special counsel’s report may be groaning with redactions, but there’s one thing the Justice Department didn’t blot out — profanity.

That’s right, we’re talking f-bombs, bastards and your garden-variety bullshit.

And the award for most laconic Mueller tweet goes to …
Sean Duffy doesn’t have time for 280 characters, and neither does Bobby Rush

Wisconsin Rep. Sean P. Duffy kept it simple Thursday on Twitter. He’d rather be podcasting, an aide said. (Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call file photo)

If you go on Twitter today (which we know you will), you’ll drown in the same tweets highlighting the same quotes from Attorney General William Barr’s press conference ahead of the highly anticipated release of the Mueller report on Russia’s interference in the 2016 election.

You’ll of course also find several members of Congress weighing in on said events, with wordy testimonies within multiple threads — which they are at liberty to do, given the First Amendment and the large platform to First Amendment on. Yes, we just made that into a verb.